He told me they were just razor bumps!
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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