We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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