I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize