Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
