It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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