Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
