it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
