Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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