Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Randomize