giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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