He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I lost the right to judge tonight
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize