Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
smell my finger.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
