...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
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