STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Holy shit dude........stairs
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
