Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Randomize