At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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