i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
