That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
