So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
