YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
