I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Randomize
