David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize