like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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