I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
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