Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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