I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
