found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
