i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
