He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
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