Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Randomize
