Don't you send me to vm
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Randomize
