Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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