You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
