Christians are straight up FREAKS
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
