Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you

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  (586): Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you http://tfl.nu/xexu
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?

  (410): View more from Maryland

  haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background

  (443): View more from Maryland

  that only happened once.

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  (443): why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag? (410): haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background (443): that only happened once. http://tfl.nu/9rml
  Replies (36) Good night (4882) Bad night (468)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

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  (860): As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists. http://tfl.nu/lted
  Replies (104) Good night (8358) Bad night (1080) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days

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  (847): I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days http://tfl.nu/mlev
  Replies (52) Good night (896) Bad night (3617)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.

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  (972): Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip. http://tfl.nu/klsb
  Replies (50) Good night (510) Bad night (6706) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"

  (1-301): View more from Maryland

  Soulmates.

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  (301): He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?" (1-301): Soulmates. http://tfl.nu/8tiz
  Replies (28) Good night (4188) Bad night (1159) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.

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  (404): I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training. http://tfl.nu/j8m4
  Replies (2) Good night (2202) Bad night (702) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.

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  (314): He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary. http://tfl.nu/wb27
  Replies (8) Good night (1160) Bad night (3518) Order T-Shirt
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.

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  (704): He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him. http://tfl.nu/wgyi
  Replies (25) Good night (6617) Bad night (877)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar

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  (781): You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar http://tfl.nu/4b1n
  Replies (6) Good night (2149) Bad night (900) Order T-Shirt
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up

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  (618): She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up http://tfl.nu/rljs
  Replies (2) Good night (835) Bad night (2200) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.

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  (615): Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success. http://tfl.nu/5s34
  Replies (4) Good night (1390) Bad night (400)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.

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  (307): You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home. http://tfl.nu/j8m0
  Replies (9) Good night (327) Bad night (1639) Order T-Shirt
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  Drinking loves me for WHO I am

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  (905): Drinking loves me for WHO I am http://tfl.nu/nlm7
  Replies (3) Good night (1025) Bad night (232) Order T-Shirt
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent

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  (907): Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent http://tfl.nu/4dji
  Replies (8) Good night (1072) Bad night (393) Order T-Shirt

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