Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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