Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
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Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
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I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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