Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
