Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Randomize
