before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
