I wanna passion pit in your ass
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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