Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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