her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize