I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Randomize
