trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
