Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
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