worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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