Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
