i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
