yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
