Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
